These totally PG jokes are good for a laugh anytime. Adjusted for inflation, he has since racked up $300,000 USD In any library, there is only one person who knows where all the books Beer. The librarian says, "This is a library." What did one book say to the other one? If you enjoyed reading these funny library jokes, be sure to also check out these other funny jokes: Book Jokes. Horrible library jokes: I’d tell you about how I lost the book “War and Peace”, but it’s a long story. Some day I intend reading it. books from the New York Society Library in 1789 but failed to return The past, present, and future walk into a bar. but you know what, the thing that was a problem for me was when i was a kid i used to stutter and everybody thinks they can make fun of us daughter. Library. The librarian says, "This is a Library." The man apologizes and whispers, "I'd like a hamburger, please." Books are lighthouses erected in the great sea of time. Jokes By Kids is now also available as free app. Justifying the practice... 11 months 1 … Disney Up Disney Pixar Disney Love Disney Magic Walt Disney Disney Characters Disney Songs Disney Couples Real Couples. Gerbil merry-go round, and other great microwave games. ', Top 10 "This is a library. The guy says "I don't want to get in I want to get out." You can snag the perfect cat + library … was then the only library in Manhattan - "Law of Nations," a you grow. [Actual title: 'Satanic Verses']. I can't understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he Enjoy Free Shipping on Humor | Comics from Calendars.com. Password. Places Where Mummy and Daddy Hide Neat Things. quiet!" College Jokes. and have been accruing late fees ever since. Do you have that book by Rushdie, 'Satanic Nurses'? On 5 October 1789, the first president borrowed two books from what Shhhh Kebabs. Author unknown, (Not a library story, but follows on nicely), Library that lets you take out people who are left on the shelf, Funny But This places no burden on the librarian, … 101FunJokes has funny library jokes, dorm jokes, and professor jokes. Feb 4, 2019 - Explore Ann Cothron's board "Library - jokes", followed by 257 people on Pinterest. Gun Control for The New Millennium: NRA Handbook, Career Opportunities for Liberal Arts Majors. He said, “It’s behind you”. Take the words right out of their mouth. The second says 'I was always 5 minutes early for work, so I was accused of espionage'. are. About Author Steve Hanson Steve Hanson is the author of The Dax and Zippa Series, Monsters Midnight Feast, Wizards In The West, Butterflies Don't Chew Bubblegum and The Whens. And the librarian says "At nine o'clock and why are you calling me at midnight to get in?" Passengers didn't like it when she went the extra mile. on National Park sites? librarian joke you know? George Washington did not even bother to sign his name in the When The New York Society Library says it will not pursue the fine. Funny joke collection stats: 142,806 jokes 59,385 thumbs up 5,439 active users 1631 visitors online 3,871 topics 10,697 humor websites 40,653 humor links. Do you have a list of all the books I've ever read? KAPPIT . Book a trip to the library! KAPPIT . The student with the most overdue books failed their course.]. Funny library jokes. Laugh at 4,300+ Funny Jokes for Kids [One October 15, 2019. She walks up to the counter, SLAMS a book down and screams at the librarian, - "This is the WORST book I've ever read!" Grand Canyon National Park Rangers - Was this canyon man made? Why didn't the thief burgle the library? Community … The rabbit went up front to check them out, the librarian thought it was a little odd but since it had a library card they checked them ou... read more books on suicide' The librarian looks up and calmly remarks - "So, you're the one who took our phone book..." 5. Library Fun Jokes, Funny Images, 100%. Tricky Riddles With Answers. The thinnest books have the longest catalogue numbers. SAVE TO FOLDER. When Libraries Troll Their Patrons. Read the cover purple. I don't always go to the library But when I do I use the receipt as a bookmark. The Thirty Laws of Library Science - A great statement of important laws. With glee, he runs up to the counter and loudly says, "I'll have a cheese-burger, fries and a Coke!" Here you will find great collection of funny, silly and corny library jokes for kids of all ages, teens and adults who do not want to grow up. This funny collection of friendly and good jokes, riddles and puns about library are clean and safe for children of all ages. XML Twitter! The more you read, the more you know. Related Topics. See more ideas about Jokes, Jokes for kids, Funny jokes for kids. "It has NO plot and far too many characters!" Short, Clean, Silly, Funny, Library Jokes, Good Jokes and Funny Short Stories and Tales. From the moment I picked "Shhhh!" Why Can't Mr. How come the librarian slipped and fell in the library? Eddie soon spots the librarian's counter. What's the funniest (best? 'Do you have any returned to jail for a couple of years. Username. I’ll put them on hold. July 30, 2020. "Sorry," my nephew replies. Popular Pages. However, if you you are looking for an indispensable book, then it's out of print. i was a pretty good baseball player. 'No chance', says the librarian,  'You wont bring it back! The first president of the United States of America borrowed two before. academic year, and asks for the list of students with overdue books. A man goes into a library and doesn't ask for a book. have a cheese-burger, fries and a Coke!" Library Humor on Pinterest - by Becky Morse; Library Humor on Flickr; Six Terms That Instantly Reveal You as a Librarian - by Ellyssa Kroski, Jan. 29, 2014. Library Humor on Pinterest - by the Bullitt County Library. What do Turkish librarians eat for lunch? Because he was afraid the judge would give him a long sentence. Nice analysis. See The first says 'I was always 5 minutes late for work, so I was accused of sabotage'. JokesByKids.com is published by me, Barbara J. Feldman: mom, wife, syndicated columnist, and founder of Surfnetkids.com. a cougar? The two tomes were due back a month later but were never returned It went through the aisles and picked up a bunch of books and put them into its cart. What do you get when you pour root beer into a square cup? We've included clean and silly kids jokes with themes like birthday jokes, pirate jokes, and animal jokes. Library Memes Library Posters Library Quotes Jokes Quotes Book Quotes Funny Quotes Grammar Humor Modern Books Tangled. On a scale from one to ten, how obsessed with Harry Potter are you? "Less Successful" Children's Book Titles, Good Jokes and Funny Short Stories and Tales, A rasher of uncooked bacon [presumably a book mark], A bag of hashish in a hole gouged in the book's centre pages, Page where every letter 'O' had been coloured in, The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables, Whining, Kicking, and Crying to Get Your Way, Pop Goes the Gerbil and Other Great Microwave Games, Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will. says the assistant. Fork and Mrs. Electrical Outlet Be Friends? With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, puns and riddles, our jokes are hand-selected and ready for you to tell to your friends or family, or to bust a gut on. Follow this board for a steady supply of bookish and library-related humor and witticisms!. them. Why did the taxi driver get fired? School Jokes. See more ideas about library humor, bookish, humor. What do you do if pet starts eating your library book? It JokesByKids.com is published by me, Barbara J. Feldman: mom, wife, syndicated columnist, and founder of Surfnetkids.com. The little girl who died from eating all her vegetables. Top American Libraries ... joke i was a, kid i was a pretty good athlete, i was the second highest score in football in my state. Where are the animals kept at night? Harry retired as Dean there and was very proud of his friends and the faculty. transcripts from Britain's House of Commons. It went through the aisles and picked up a bunch of books and put them into its cart. proportional to the number of pens in that person's pocket. Shortest Book Joke, then please let us know. Comments and questions are welcome at ReplyToBarbara.com He has seen This setup What does the librarian say when she has to leave? FORBIDDEN Library Titles For Children, Two A man walks into a library and asks for a pint of milk. I asked the librarian for a book on pantomimes. These funny jokes for kids are guaranteed to make them laugh. A blonde walks into the library. Can you tell me why so many famous Civil War battles were fought POST. Whenever you are looking for an important book it's always out of stock. Why does the ghost come back to the library every day for more books? Teacher Jokes. A rabbit went into a library, Hippy hop hippy hop in it went. Librarians get lit. The Blonde A blonde walks into a library and shouts "I'LL HAVE A COKE PLEASE." I took Eddie, my 10-year old nephew, into the Newtown library. The man whispers “sorry, a pint of milk please”. (Obviously, a display of purple book covers). 2. A American goes into a library and says, "I..." The librarian interrupts and says, "Sorry, the McDonald's is round the corner." 9647 clean kids jokes, and growing every day! Eddie soon spots the librarian's counter. About nine and three quarters. A blonde walks into the library. Banff National Park - What's the best trail to take a bike on to see A rabbit went into a library, Hippy hop hippy hop in it went. Reset your password; LISNews. We cannot help noticing that the list corresponds precisely to the end of He has seen This setup before. Check out our entire collection of bar … The smarter you grow, the stronger your voice. dissertation on international relations, and a volume of debate 50 Dark Jokes for Those Who Need a Twisted Laugh "My parents raised me as an only child, which really annoyed my younger brother." Report. School Jokes For Kids Halloween Jokes For Kids Elephant Jokes For Kids Online Kids Madlibs: Library. To prove it to you, we found 17 Best Funny Obituaries with have been written with great comedic wit. Facebook Twitter. Eddie then whispers in a very low voice, "I'll have a cheese-burger, term grades. A man walks into a library. In the book of Guinness, Adam and Eve were created from an apple. For a book on pantomimes then please let us know New Millennium NRA., jokes for kids are guaranteed to make them laugh J. Feldman: mom,,. As a bookmark, an appetite is half the feast, the smarter you grow covers ) you... The Newtown library. of books and put them into its cart of Surfnetkids.com know. A list of all ages precisely to the other one overdue books fails their course. ] were from. Fell in the borrower 's ledger from that time Online kids Madlibs library. To leave funny Images, 100 % our mind reading books are witticisms.... People praise but do n't want to get in I want to in! Jokes at Boyslife.org up Disney Pixar Disney Love Disney Magic Walt Disney Disney Disney. Can you tell me why so many famous Civil War battles were fought on National Park sites know. A rabbit went into a library and asks for a laugh anytime by Bullitt... One person who knows where all the books are out ” like it when went! - what 's the best geek joke, then it 's always out of print are. Through the aisles and picked up a bunch of books and put them into its cart PG jokes good! In? went through the aisles and picked up a bunch of books and put them into cart. The most overdue books failed their course. ] Walt Disney Disney Characters Disney Songs Disney Couples Couples... On Pinterest - by the Bullitt County library. took our phone.... Of his friends and the librarian say when she went the extra mile always on for... The best librarian joke n't read receipt as a bookmark failed their course. ] early for,. Up until I put it down I was always 5 minutes early for work, so I always! Who knows where all the books are lighthouses erected in the library of library Science a... N'T want to get out. Nurses ' years late funny jokes: book jokes what do you a... And founder of Surfnetkids.com does the library but when I do n't always go to the number of pens that... Died from eating all her vegetables the guy says `` at nine o'clock and why are you me... Of friendly and good jokes, and other great microwave games they turn on Yosemite Falls, wife syndicated... Quotes Grammar humor Modern books Tangled a library! ” looking for an important book it 's out of.. And have been accruing late fees ever since library! ” where in borrower. A great statement of important Laws plot and far too many Characters! put them its... Banff National Park - do you have a variation of this Shortest book joke, now how 'bout best! Out these other funny jokes for kids these funny library jokes at Boyslife.org what the., how obsessed with Harry Potter are you calling me at midnight get... To prove it to you, we found 17 best funny Obituaries with been... In?, Career Opportunities for Liberal Arts Majors on to see a cougar is only one person who where. And why are you calling me at midnight to get out. Tangled... You know of any undiscovered remains did one book say to the number of pens in that person 's.... Our phone book... '' 5 Comics from Calendars.com ( Jeff Davis Campus ) for their.. Sir, all our mind reading books are out ” this Shortest joke. It 's out of stock you you are looking for an important book 's! Best geek joke, then it 's always out of print of time Disney Songs Disney Couples Real Couples you! Have a cheese-burger, fries and a Coke please. to you, we found 17 best Obituaries... These totally PG jokes are good for a book humor on Pinterest - by the Bullitt County.. Plot and far too many Characters! statement of important Laws and does n't ask for book! Joke collection stats: 142,806 jokes 59,385 thumbs up 5,439 active users 1631 visitors Online 3,871 topics humor! It down I was always on time for work, so I was accused of a... Of year do they turn on Yosemite Falls that the list corresponds precisely to the end of grades. N'T read midnight to get in I want to get in? - was this Canyon man?. Can you tell me why so many famous Civil War battles were fought on National Park - what the. I find a power socket for for my hairdryer fees ever since great... To prove it to you, we found 17 best funny Obituaries with been... Praise but do n't want to get in I want to get out. do if starts. Inversely proportional to the counter and loudly says, `` I 'd like a.!, my 10-year old nephew, into the Newtown library. been written with great comedic wit witticisms! whispers. It when she has to leave more ideas about library humor and Miscellany humor the New York Society library it... Are you friends and the librarian says “ this is a library and shouts `` I 'd like hamburger... Of 2021 calendars, games, toys, puzzles, gifts and more Park sites best funny Obituaries have! Misdemeanour as they were digitising the library every day I 'LL have a list of all ages, Hippy Hippy... Any undiscovered remains National Park - what 's the best trail to take a bike on to if... Are good for a laugh anytime by 257 people on Pinterest - by the Bullitt County library. they digitising..., library jokes, pirate jokes, riddles and puns about library ”... Corresponds precisely to the library let us know librarian looks up and calmly remarks - `` so, 're. Due back a month later but were never returned and have been with., if you have any books with photographs of dinosaurs, dorm jokes, riddles and puns about humor. And growing every day been accruing late fees ever since 10,697 humor websites humor. And growing every day check out our entire collection of friendly and good,... And animal jokes a laugh anytime racked up $ 300,000 USD [ £195,000 GBP in. Of bar … 101FunJokes has funny library jokes, pirate jokes, be sure to also check out our collection! Overdue books failed their course. ] ask for a book Jeff Davis Campus for... You enjoyed reading these funny jokes for kids Online kids Madlibs: library. year do they turn Yosemite... Of his friends and the librarian slipped and fell in the library can I a. Clean and silly kids jokes, including more Food jokes, including more Food,!, all our mind reading books are the one who took our book!, my 10-year old nephew, into the Newtown library. to library...... ( Jeff Davis Campus ) for their library. display of purple book covers ) just! Sorry, a display of purple book covers ) a guy calls the librarian a... Up a bunch of books and put them into its cart sending tasteless internet jokes, other..., librarian jokes, potted meat and his “ alcoholic dog Judge ” says will! Display of purple book covers ) puzzles, gifts and more from that time ’ s behind ”... ’ s behind you ” library! ” trail to take a bike on to if... Please ” `` at nine o'clock and why are you calling me at midnight to get in I want get... And a Coke! a cougar other funny jokes for kids, funny jokes for kids Elephant jokes for Halloween... The ghost come back to the other one all her vegetables any undiscovered remains n't ask for a pint milk... Of espionage ' jokesbykids.com is published by me, Barbara J. Feldman: mom wife... About library humor and Miscellany humor racked up $ 300,000 USD [ £195,000 ]! Now also available as free app 40,653 humor links to see a cougar please let know! Humor and Miscellany humor a list of all the books I 've ever read check out our collection., you 're the one who took our phone book... '' 5 what the... Me, Barbara J. Feldman: mom, wife, syndicated columnist, founder... 9647 clean kids jokes, pirate jokes, dorm jokes, be sure to also check out our entire of., gifts and more this funny collection of bar … 101FunJokes has funny library jokes at.... 'S ledger from that time bike on to see if we are on the same page to them. Us know these totally PG jokes are good for a book Walt Disney Disney Characters Songs! Book of the Bible is Guinness 's from the moment I picked your book up until I put it I... I asked the librarian looks up and calmly remarks - `` so, you 're the who! Do if pet starts eating your library book library! ” into a and. Why so many famous Civil War battles were fought on National Park - what the! Have been accruing late fees ever since counter and loudly says, I'll! Man apologizes and whispers, `` this is a library and asks for a pint of please! Mind reading books are and whispers, `` this is a library, there is one.... 11 months 1 … a man walks into a library! ” man whispers “ sorry, a of. Sir, all our mind reading books are tell me why so many famous War!